February Monthly Connection

Should you stay with someone just to keep up appearances?

Helmer from A Doll House states: “From now on, there can be no question of happiness. All we can do is save bits and pieces the wreck, preserve appearances…” At this point in the play, Helmer has just found out about how Nora borrowed money from Krogstad and now she is in trouble because Krogstad is blackmailing her to get his job back after Helmer fired him. This was Helmer’s response when he found all of this out.

This play relates to a lot of people’s lives in society, especially Helmer’s reaction and how they should stay together to keep up appearances. In society some people decide to stay in a marriage even if they don’t love each other, just to keep up appearances and so their lives won’t change. People care more about appearances and what other people think than their feelings or the feelings of the people around them.

Helmer shows that he really has no feelings or love for Nora and he is just worried about what other people think. This is also the point in the play where Nora sees for the first time what their marriage really is. I believe that if you are not happy, it is not worth trying to save something just for appearances. You should always follow your heart. If a man doesn't love you enough to at least try to see where your coming from then he doesn't deserve you. All Nora was trying to do was save his life and he didn't even consider that. One moment he was I love you and I will do anything for you and then when he found out everything could go wrong he turned around and said that all they could do was try to save appearances because that was the most important thing.